My roommate...

I believe my roommate is an idiot savant. A few years ago he was drunk one night and started writing dialogues that involve two testicles. He called them "Ballalogues." Last night my roommate wrote a new one after consuming a few too many beers and I cannot tell whether I am smarter or dumber for having read it. So here, for the first time, in its entirety is a conversations between Lamar and Reginald, two balls:

Lamar is wondering why the fuck Reginald has been on the toilet for 3 hours…

Reginald: Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, oh yeah fucking christ I should’ve taken you to the prom, fuck yeah, just a little more, whew

Lamar: You are probably the most disgusting ball I’ve ever met, maybe only the only ball I’ve ever met you stupid ramshackle excuse for a ball.

Reginald: flakfj;laskjdfsdflj;slkfj

Lamar: How lame, to use the middle line keys only to reply to my bitching.

Reginald: Let’s put is this way. You have been working your little ass off to produce sperm and in reality, Mr. Big upstairs hasn’t been using it too wisely lately in my opinion, and my opinion has been very clouded by booze lately.

Lamar: And so has his…Sometimes I feel like I am the only straight thinker around here. I just re-organized every closet in this goddamn ballsac. By the way, your tomato plant seeds. I flushed that shit down the toilet.

Reginald: Well, I am going to calmly inform you that THOSE WERE NOT TOMATO SEEDS YOU FUCKING MORON. I have been harvesting marijuana seeds ever since big boy upstairs starting smoking weed and cutting down on our production. Now I have no leverage in our existence. I see no other way past this unless you pay for my drinking habit for 1 year or suck my dick, hahaha.

Lamar: You have no dick you fucking ball